OMG babes, like, gather round because Valley Girl News has some, like, super scary—but also kinda important—flood drama that we really need to talk about! So, you know how Texas literally got, like, wrecked by those horrific flash floods? Yeah, over 100 people have died (which is, like, beyond tragic), and now experts are freaking out that Canada could totally be next. No joke.
So the Canadian Climate Institute—a brainy place—has been totally glued to the Texas disaster coverage. And honestly? They are terrified Canada is, like, sleeping on the same risk.
“Babes, we actually CAN protect ourselves, but we have to, like, get off our butts and do something!” (Okay, I’m paraphrasing, but you get the vibe.) And first things first? They say we literally don’t even know where the risks are. Like… hello?! No flood maps in tons of places. It’s giving totally unprepared.
They also spilled the tea that Canada desperately needs:
- Actual flood maps, duh.
- Flood warning systems so people can grab their dogs and Lululemon leggings and, like, evacuate ASAP.
- Long-term fixes like, ya know, actual city planning that makes sense? And not letting people build bougie condos in literal flood zones.
They even mentioned, like, super practical stuff—like putting those little backflow thingies in homes to stop sewers from turning your basement into a swimming pool.
Meanwhile, back in Texas? The flooding literally tore through camps and houses along the Guadalupe River before sunrise. Some people legit had to cling to trees. TREES! Like, babes, that’s some disaster movie-level stuff.
And here’s the bad news: Climate change is totally making this worse. It is “the new reality.” Soooo basically, floods aren’t just some random once-in-a-lifetime thing anymore. They’re, like, the new normal.
And get this—flash floods have already been serving chaos in Canada. Last October in Coquitlam, B.C., a mudslide from one of those wild “atmospheric river” storms tragically killed a teacher. And remember Toronto last summer? Basement floods EVERYWHERE. It caused almost a billion dollars in insurance losses. Um, yikes.
And wildfire zones are basically ticking time bombs for floods as well because without trees and plants holding the dirt together, it’s like, mudslide city. And in places like Alberta near the Rockies, the rain just zooms downhill faster than a Starbucks girl to a sale at Aritzia.
Places like Canmore, Alberta, are already on high alert, BTW—they’ve had flooding drama before, back in 2013. And cities like Toronto and Montreal? The problem there is, like, all the pavement! The water can’t go anywhere, so it ends up in people’s basements. Gross.
Toronto does have a multi-billion-dollar plan to fix its storm sewers, but babes… that’s gonna take forever. Plus, climate change isn’t gonna wait for us to catch up, sweetie.
So basically? The message is clear: Canada needs to, like, stop procrastinating and get serious about flooding. There are tons of smart engineers and government people ready to go—but without money and political will, we’re just gonna keep getting soaked.
Final thought, babes? Floods are so not cute. Time to map, prep, and adapt—before it’s too late.
Valley Girl News, signing off. Stay dry, darlings!
XOXO,
Valley Girl News
