by admin | Jul 27, 2025 | Sunday Brain Brunch
Omigod babes, Girl Math is, like, totally the reason your bank account is crying but your serotonin levels are THRIVING. Welcome to the era of glam financial delusion—where returning an outfit is basically income and paying in cash is free. And no, this isn’t satire,...
by admin | Jul 25, 2025 | Canada, Economy, Uncategorized, USA
Like, oh my gosh, buckle up babes because things are totally not chill between the U.S. and Canada right now — and it’s, like, so your wallet’s problem now too. Welcome to Valley Girl News where trade wars are so last season, but nobody told Trump. Trump just casually...
by admin | Jul 24, 2025 | Canada, Legal Issues, Opinion, Women
By Valley Girl News Babe. BABE. We have literally never been so furious, confused, and betrayed by a verdict in our lives. The five junior hockey players who were accused of sexually assaulting a young woman in a London, Ontario hotel room in 2018? They were all just...
by admin | Jul 24, 2025 | Celebrity, Culture
Okay babes, like, let’s talk about the man, the myth, the eyeliner-wearing legend: Ozzy freaking Osbourne. He was, like, literally the godfather of heavy metal and also, like, the reason your boyfriend wears leather jackets and listens to music that sounds like a...
by admin | Jul 22, 2025 | Canada, Economy
By Valley Girl News Okay sooo, in late June, PM Mark Carney was like, “Let’s go BIG,” and babes, he meant it—he dropped the biggest defense spending promise since, like, WW2. That means Canada’s gonna start spending 5% of its entire GDP on defense by 2035. Like,...
by admin | Jul 20, 2025 | Sunday Brain Brunch
OMG babe, remember when social media was, like, actually social? When people posted random selfies with flash on, blurry concert pics, or like, their cat doing something weird? Well yeah, that era? It’s basically dead. Social media isn’t social...
by admin | Jul 20, 2025 | Business, Celebrity
Okay so like imagine you’re just vibing at a Coldplay concert, right? Like you’re emotional, probably crying during “The Scientist,” and then BOOM—Andy Byron (CEO of Astronomer—a $1B company!) gets caught on camera straight-up hugging his mistress. And like not a...
by admin | Jul 18, 2025 | Canada, Environment
Canada’s Climate Status Is, Like, NOT It—Unless You Love Wildfires, GHGs, and Empty Promises! Okay babes, so, like, Canada says it’s doing something about climate change… but the vibes are, like, mega mixed. So here’s what’s actually happening in our...
by admin | Jul 17, 2025 | Canada, Tragedy, USA
So like, a Canadian guy literally died in U.S. immigration custody and the whole thing is giving major shady vibes?? His name was Johnny Noviello, 49, and he wasn’t even undocumented or anything—he had a green card since the early ’90s, okay? He moved to the U.S. in...
by admin | Jul 17, 2025 | Canada, Economy, USA
Canada & U.S. Are Like, SO Not Vibing Right Now. So like, hi babes, it’s Valley Girl News and today we’re talking about, like, the most dramatic international friendship breakup of the year — Canada and the U.S. Like, they’re not technically at war but, um,...
