So like, OMG you guys, after forever of this back-and-forth tariff tantrum, the United States and China are finally taking a breather. Like, for real. They just dropped a 90-day truce in Geneva over the weekend, and yes—it’s major.
The US was all, “Hey let’s not totally ruin the global economy,” and China was like, “K fine, but you blink first.” And now? They’re both backing off their insane tariffs for a hot minute so they can actually talk like grownups. Revolutionary, right?
So here’s the tea: America is slashing tariffs on Chinese stuff from a sky-high 145% to a more tolerable 30%, and China’s returning the favor—dropping theirs from a spicy 125% to just 10%. Like, slay. Both sides said, “Let’s use this cute 90-day window to figure our 💩 out,” and honestly? Mood.
Tariff Tantrums Turned Time-Out. Just a sec ago, things were literally on fire. Supply chains were wrecked, inflation was giving “no thank you,” and businesses were spiraling. The vibes? Not it.
China was dragging the US in their state media, using throwback Mao Zedong videos (like, retro but hostile), and the US was accusing China of economic shade and fentanyl drama. It was giving Cold War cosplay, not gonna lie.
But suddenly, in Geneva—aka neutral territory with cute chocolate—the vibes changed. US Treasury hottie Scott Bessent and Trade Rep Jamieson Greer sat down with Chinese VP He Lifeng and hashed it out over what we assume were very strong espressos.
“This isn’t, like, surrender—it’s just a pause, babe,” Bessent said, totally serious and trying not to smile for the cameras. “Nobody wants a messy breakup. We just need to talk boundaries.”
Money Talks, Obviously. Let’s be real: this was all about the coins. American companies were freaking out over skyrocketing prices and delayed shipments, and Chinese exporters were like, “Omg we have literally no one to sell to.” Factories were ghosting employees, and some even bounced to Vietnam for cheaper vibes. Yikes.
Now with this little trade glow-up, both sides are unblocking each other and maybe texting again. China even agreed to send over more rare earth stuff—like, those sparkly minerals you need for EVs, missiles, and iPhones. Cute, right?
And get this: China might even start buying more American goods again. We love a full-circle moment.
Wall Street Is Screaming. Girl, the markets ate this up. Hong Kong’s Hang Seng Index shot up 3.1% (like, werk), and US stocks are living their best lives—especially in tech and manufacturing. Everybody’s shipping stuff as fast as possible before the 90-day countdown ends, like it’s Black Friday for cargo.
“Freight prices are already up, honey,” said Alex Xu, a Shenzhen trade guru. “Everybody wants their goodies now.” Honestly, same.
Political Shade? You Bet. Not everyone’s being chill about it though. Team Trump was totally there, with Greer using the moment to throw some side-eye at Biden’s squad. He was all, “We’re just cleaning up your mess, boo,” and we’re like 👀.
The Trump trade team is still playing hardball though. There’s still a 10% general tariff on pretty much everyone and a 20% one on China over that whole fentanyl drama. (Yeah, that convo’s still happening too—awkward.)
Europe’s Like, “Can You Not?” Meanwhile, Europe’s sipping espresso and watching from the sidelines like it’s a Netflix drama. “We love that you’re talking again, but also—can we get some stability please?” said Jens Eskelund, who runs the EU Chamber of Commerce in China. He’s tired, besties.
So, What’s Next? The plan is to keep talking, like, seriously, in late June. The hope? A long-term vibe shift that deals with real problems like unfair subsidies, tech drama, and IP theft (not the cute kind of stealing).
But don’t hold your breath. Trade experts are side-eyeing this truce hard. “It’s a big deal… but also extremely fragile,” said Wendy Cutler, a trade queen from the Asia Society. “Like, they’ve promised good behavior before, remember?”
Trump, meanwhile, couldn’t help himself. He posted on Truth Social (ugh): “America First, but not America Alone.” Okay, poet. So yeah. For now, it’s peace signs and lower tariffs, but don’t toss your spreadsheets just yet. This trade war might be wearing lip gloss—but she’s not done being messy.
XOXO,
Valley Girl News
